10 January, 2008

My Living Will

I, Two Crows, being of sound mind and body, do not wish to be kept alive indefinitely by artificial means.
Under no circumstances should my fate be put in the hands of pinhead politicians who couldn't pass ninth-grade biology if their lives depended on it, or lawyers / doctors interested in simply running up the bills.
If a reasonable amount of time passes and I fail to ask for at least one of the following:
Chocolate
Hamburger with onions
Malt w/ Whipped cream
French Fries
southern comfort manhatten
Pizza
Ice Cream
Chocolate
Cafe Mocha Latte
Chocolate
Sex
... it should be presumed that I won't ever get better.
When such a determination is reached, I hereby instruct my appointed person and attending physicians to pull the plug, reel in the tubes, and turn out the lights - - -
"The party's over!!!"

3 comments:

an average patriot said...

Hi two crows
I have to laugh, Maxine is always a riot isn't she?

Mary Ellen said...

I wonder if they can give you chocolate via intravenous feedings?

Maxine is one of my favorites, I always go right to her cards when looking for cards for my mom. My husband has an aunt that is just like her...even looks like her!

two crows said...

hi, AAP--
that she is! and thanx for the link you left over at PP&D. I checked out her cards. priceless! :D

hey, Mary Ellen--
chocolate intravenously? now, THERE'S a worthwhile medical research project. I wonder if there's a gov't grant available?

and to have Maxine in your family??? oh, you, lucky thing, you! :)